Ungodly me

I like to play God. 


It’s a shocking statement….and I must admit my stomach cramped up a little when I saw it in black and white. But as shocking and sinful as it is, unfortunately, it’s true. 


I like to control things, I like to direct paths, I like to fix stuff, I like to instruct, I like to maneuver, and if I am not very careful, I find that to accomplish all of these things, I also like to manipulate.  Wow. Not a very pretty picture of me, is it? 


Over the last year or so, I have been asking God to show me my heart.  This has to be one of the scariest prayers I have ever committed to praying, ya’ll.  My heart is wicked.  I think, say, and do things that are completely contrary to God’s instructions to me.  There are times I am not kind, loving, or patient….and I absolutely miss the mark on that whole gentleness thing.  When I see these things in me, I get discouraged.  I allow satan to convince me I am the same selfish, prideful, impatient, unkind, manipulative, unsaved woman I was 10 years ago.


But you know what?  Because of Jesus Christ, I am not that same woman. God tells me I am chosen, I am holy, I am dearly loved.  Because of Christ, I am not who I was, He is making me new.  Therefore, I can clothe myself with compassion, kindness, gentleness, and patience.  All those God honoring things I am unable to do in my own strength, I can do through Him.  And so can you. 


Are you allowing yourself to live in the shackles of your past?  There is freedom in forgiveness and there is new life in Christ.  If you know Him, allow Him to show you who you are to Him, you’ll be amazed at how precious you are to Him.  If you don’t know Him, may I encourage you to ask Him to speak to your heart? He can take away that bitterness, hurt, and shame…..and give you lasting Hope.


Father God, thank you, that You are good.  That Your love endures forever. Lord, only you can institute lasting change in our lives and You are the only unshakable foundation that infuses our lives with love, compassion, patience, kindness, and gentleness.  Forgive us, Lord, where we have tried to play God.  Where we have tried to manipulate people and situations and in turn seek to glorify ourselves and not You.  God you alone are worthy of our praise.  Help us to remember who we are in You and mold us in to the God honoring people You intend us to be. We love You, and we praise You. In Christ’s name, Amen.


Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Colossians 3:12

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