Redemption in the Brokenness

redemption story

“I’m so broken, I can’t even write.”

I sobbed these words to a friend, recently.

Writing is my release. My heart dump, if you will. It’s where I get all the feelings out, even if I never share them publicly.

I have a process. I open a document for each month. That way, I have somewhere to bang out a few sentences with no pressure to make them into something coherent. I’m currently writing this in a document aptly named “October writing.” This document actually contains some sentences….finally.

Because these last several months? Even though I’ve sat down to write 1000 times, ALL of those documents are blank.

There are no paragraphs. No sentences. No words.

This last year has been ridiculously hard for Todd and me. One of the hardest. And we’re still in the middle of the yuck. So much so, I can’t even get into details without breaking down.

I’ve felt so weighted down by all the things we’ve been walking through, oftentimes it feels like I’m just going through the motions. I want to be joyful in hope, but some days, the best I can do is thank Jesus I made it out of bed.

But God is faithful, y’all.

He continues to love on us, encourage us, and strengthen us.

Through His word, His Spirit, and His people.

They point us to Truth when we feel we’re drowning in lies. They pray us through the days we can’t seem to form our words into prayers. They remind us we’re not alone on what feels like an impossibly lonely road.

I don’t know why we’re in the midst of this battle. We certainly wouldn’t have chosen it for ourselves. But it’s in this battle we’re learning to filter life through God’s Truth and trust His will.

It’s in these hard places we see Him fighting for us.

And here in the brokenness, we can’t help but praise Him, because we know His is the victory.

Friends, sometimes life is just hard. If you find yourself battered and broken tonight, please hear me when I say, it won’t be hard and yucky forever. God’s working on our behalf.

And in the meantime? Let’s lean into Jesus and allow Him to use our brokenness to let His Light shine through.

He will use this redemption story He’s writing in our lives for His glory.

Because He is good, y’all, even when we’re tempted to let our circumstances convince us otherwise.

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

Lord, we find ourselves in such hard places right now. It’s hard to see the Light in the midst of all the darkness and it’s hard to trust Your will when we don’t understand the pain. Jesus, draw near to us, cover us in Your peace, give us rest in Your presence and help us trust Your sovereignty even when it’s hard. We love you, Jesus. Amen.

3 Things We Can Do When We Don’t Know What to Do

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Life is just hard, y’all.

Even when I know in the depths of my soul that I’m blessed beyond all I could ask, hope or imagine.

I still feel like I’ve been suckered punched in the gut sometimes. Especially right now in this season of life.

My stomach hurts. My palms are clammy.  My eye is twitching.

And this life stuff that’s got me all out of whack? There’s absolutely, NOT ONE THING, I can do to fix it.

As a doer, this is a HARD place for me. And I know it’s a hard place for you, too.

I wish I had a fairy wand to sprinkle “LIFE IS FABULOUS” dust all around, but I just don’t.

What I do have are some suggestions on what we can do when we don’t know what to do.

I’m sure there’s more than three. But these three?

Tried and true, my friend, and I’m speaking from experience.

  1. Pray  Sometimes the best we can do is whisper the name of Jesus. And that’s ok. Our prayers aren’t powerful because of us, but because of Him.


    Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

  2. Stand firm Our faith can get shaky when we’re in the midst of life’s battles, but we must hold fast to what we know is true. Our God never fails. 


    Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love. I Corinthians 16:13-14

  3. Rally the troops God didn’t create us to do life alone. When the weight of this world threatens to crush us, reaching out to others can help us share the burden. Even when #mypeople don’t have the answers, their prayers and words of encouragement are like a balm for my soul.


    Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

Father, God, thank you that you hear our prayers. Help us to trust Your plans even when we don’t understand. Let us stand firm in our faith in You. Lord, we know You are faithful. Surround us with people who love you and who will help carry the burdens of this life and help us to recognize those in need and do the same for them. We love you, Jesus. Amen.